As we were packing up to move, I found a pair of Gram's shoe orthotics. These were the custom-made kind, meaning they had been molded from casts of her feet.
This also means they are completely useless to anyone but her. But they were made from her and that's why I kept them.
We all have an item or items we gravitate towards after someone we love dies. We want to keep the object. But, would they have wanted you to keep it?
As I've talked to people who have lost loved ones I've found that most people can still "hear" the voice of the deceased person. Not that they're hallucinating, but that they remember what the person's voice sounded like. They remember what that person likely would have said in a certain situation. Let the memory of their voice and their responses help you declutter.
Gram was a minimalist. She was very frugal. But she also knew when something was really not usable anymore. She would not have wanted me to keep something that couldn't help anyone and would just take up space. I can almost hear her telling me, "For heaven's sake, sweetheart, they're no good to anyone else. You should get rid of them."
Out they go. Item #56, Gram's orthotics.
I knew that Gram wanted me to get rid of these things. But what do you do if you feel that your relative would have wanted you to keep the item in question?
Hang on to it for the moment. There is no pressure to do this quickly. We'll take a look at this problem in an upcoming Grief and Clutter post. Like grieving itself, you will deal with grief clutter when you are ready to deal with it.