Friday, January 3, 2014

2014 Priorities -- Totally Irrational List

New Year’s Resolutions, blah blah blah. These things are triggering for my eating disorder because I can be a perfectionist. If I don’t accomplish a goal I feel like I’ve failed. Then I turn to food (or away from it) to compensate for not being good enough. Silly, no?

Obviously I don’t need help understanding what my goals are. I can make those easily. What I need is something to help me throughout the year when I face choices that can take me farther away from those goals or closer to them. Priorities seem the right thing to set up here.  Or, let me just write down everything and let's see how crazy I am.

1. Finish the kitchen and deliver all payments
2. Contribute to retirement accounts in full
3. Contribute to emergency fund
4. Contribute to investments
5. Contribute to student loan with regular payments, extra $ from gifts, windfalls, and side-hustle proceeds
6. Spend money on truly beneficial self-care activities
7. Continue to reduce the number of bank accounts I have.
8. Find a medication that doesn’t make me gain weight or make my disorder worse
9. Attend appointments
10. Reduce eating disorder symptom use
11. Continue blogging
12. Reduce benzoates/aspartame in diet
13. Make a binder of all of the songs I want to learn
14. Learn those songs
15. Try practicing for real!
16. Finish painting and setting up our Matrix room
17. Continue to declutter and blog
18. Be interactive with my readers (respond to comments, dammit!)
19. Finish quilt for J
20. Finish Gram’s sampler
21. Read one fiction and one n-f book at a time! (ideas below)
a. Taking Care of Parents Who Didn’t Take Care of You
b. The End of Growth
c. The Upside of Down
d. Sinsajo
e. El Juego de Ender
f. Moonrise
g. Pastwatch
22. Finish quilt for M
23. Exercise in some form daily, being respectful of my muscles’ need for rest
24. Hair and makeup for work
25. Learn to do a professional manicure
26. Use my graduated water bottles
27. Try meditation
28. Read some Spanish books for practice
29. Take a class for practice
30. Watch some Spanish TV
31. Study abroad this summer
32. Regularly watch The Simpsons
33. Continue to volunteer
34. Do nothing and be okay with it

Or maybe I'll just do this:
Instead, how 'bout I just: 
  • Try to spend less than last year
  • Read a few books in Spanish
  • Actually go to my therapy appointments this year
  • Write down the songs I want to learn on guitar ('cause then I'll sit and learn 'em)
  • Finish a quilt
  • Throw my side-hustle money at my student loan
  • Move daily 
  • Let it go
That's better. Thank you for helping me with my therapy. Happy 2014!


  1. Wow! That's a lot of priorities! I'm far too lazy for that sort of thing.

    But... if you do want to watch some Spanish TV, I advise getting yourself hooked on one of those telenovelas. The one that totally did me in was Corazón Salvaje -

    It was in reruns be the time I discovered it and Univision was playing it as part of their "club de los desvelados" (insomniacs club) from 2-4am... OY! It totally ruined me in terms of my night-owliness, but I couldn't help myself, I just LOVED it! I've found a condensed DVD version at the library, but would love to find some way to watch the whole series again.

    1. That was what my therapist called my "totally irrational to-do list," designed to be thrown out and replaced with sanity. Since I haven't seen a therapist in far too long, thank you for providing the sanity!

      I didn't know that the telenovelas were on VHS (or now DVD)...must check netflix. Thanks!

    2. Ha! Your new list sounds much more manageable. I particularly like the "let it go" part! :-)

      And that Stephen Colbert graphic is priceless!

  2. Your irrational to do list looks like my 'aims' for last year...this year I have a list which resembles your rational list, and my brain feels much better for it!

    1. here's to a relaxed 2014 and thank heavens for short lists!

  3. Your yearly list looks a lot like my daily lists...and I do often look/act just like that Colbert vid.

    I'm trying to have a few main points for the year: calm down more, eat better/less processed foods, find an elementary school, move to a new place, and keep up with what I'm already doing. That's it. I *could* add a million other things, but I like your priority list at the bottom. The fewer things to really focus on, the better :)

    1. oh yes, that's what my daily lists look like too! It sounds like you've got a pretty solid priorities list right there though. Will look forward to seeing updates on those things on your blog!

  4. That's a list alright. During December, I work on 100 Promises to Myself. I have always honored the new year's encouragement to shift and perhaps get it together. The idea of promises is that these are ways I enjoy living and moving. I just need a reminder. Now, the interesting thing is, I did not include working on my blog. Hmm.

    Clearing clutter...That's how I got here. I'm on it, tomorrow.

    1. Sometimes it's easy to skip over the most obvious ones. I've been skipping the decluttering thing for a while. Definitely need to get back into it!

  5. You have a pretty long list. But in my opinion, it’s just great. A long list means a busy and productive year for you. I hope you can accomplish everything on your list and finally win over your eating disorder.

    Aubrey @

    1. Thank you! Best of luck with your primary care practice. I hope it's a wonderful year for you!


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